"I'll see you in Hell!!!" ~Laurie Strode, indeed

The year is now 2002, and Laurie Strode is locked away at the Grace Anderson Sanitarium. We learn that she did not behead Michael, rather an innocent paramedic who was up for a game of "switching bodies". Michael, of course, crushed the guy's trachea so he could not speak.

It isn't long before Michael's after Laurie once again, but she's still ready for him. He follows her to the roof, where he falls for an incredibly convuluted trap. It backfires when Laurie decides to take off his mask. He ends up stabbing her in the back. She kisses Michael on the lips and mutters "I'll see you in hell!" before plunging to her supposed death.

We cut to the Haddonfield University, where we meet Sara Moyer, the egg-head in class. Then we meet her only two friends, Rudy and Tina 2 (aka Jenna).

They inform her that they have all been picked to partake in an internet broadcast, searching the home of Michael Myers. Sara doesn't want to...she is deathly afraid of Michael Myers...for some reason.

We meet the other kids, Jim, Donna, and Bill. We also meet Sara's internet fuck-buddy Myles Berman aka Deckard...a freshman who has no life outside the internet.

We also meet Freddie Harris, the kung-fu loving owner of Dangertainment, and his assistant Nora Winston.

The kids venture through the Myers house, scaring each other, smoking from bongs, flashing the web cams, having sex in the Myers Underground Labyrinthe, and dying gory deaths.

In the end, only Sara and Freddie survive, by electrocuting Michael in the Myers Garage. However, when a nurse at the morgue examines his charred body, his eyes shoot open.

Bring on Halloween 9, Akkad.

Evil Finds It's Way Home

Well, folks...The mid-summertime of 2002 can only mean one thing...Halloween: Resurrection is released upon the world after a lot of complications. The movie was originally supposed to be released in 2000, "cleverly" titled Halloween H2K: Evil Never Dies (or something along those lines). However, Creative Controll (aka Money-Intake) battles were currently underway between Moustapha Akkad and Dimension (similar in tone to the infamous Carpenter Vs. Akkad trial after Halloween III). Once Akkad won, the movie was scheduled to be released in 2001 under the title Halloween: MichaelMyers.com....then eventually to Halloween: Homecoming. Jamie Lee Curtis, who just LOVED the Halloween movies and just LOVED the fans, did not want to return to the franchise (deja vu in check). However, she was contractually obligated to return, so she did. She apparently did not like what had been written in the script, and she ended up staying for a three day shoot with a Jamie Lee Curtis approved draft of her script. Dwight Little was offered a directorial spot, but passed. He hated the script, and Dimension...not to mention Akkad... would not budge on changing it (at the time). After a few other candidates opted not to be attached to the movie, Dimension found Rick Rosenthal. In a fantastic stroke of luck, Rick happons to have directed Halloween II, back in 1981. So, the webpages were aflood in promotion stating the director of Halloween II (which is commonly liked in general) is back..."this movie is sure to rock". It was shot, but then the oddest thing happoned. The release date was pulled, and all publicity for the movie was called to a direct halt. It seems that initial screenings of the movie were so badly received, they had no choice but to go back and do some HEAVY, HEAVY reshooting. Once again, the webpages were stating "This movie will rock for the fans!"

So we have another Halloween movie, one that Moustapha Akkad swore up and down would be "more for the fans" since he won "creative controll" of the franchise once again. A Halloween movie which Jamie Lee Curtis is returning to one final time, with her own take on how Laurie should go out. A Halloween movie directed by a true Halloween veteran, who said in interviews he wanted to make a movie which riveled the first Halloween in terms of eerie atmoushpere and simpleness. In essence, a Halloween movie for the fans that would rock.

But did it rock?

Pppppffffft. To put it mildly, no.

On paper, Halloween: Resurrection (which I will call Halloween 8, or H8, for simplicity's sake) sounds mildly interesting. Actually, it would be good fan-fiction. A group of teens gather in the Myers house on Halloween night looking for clues as to why Michael decided to kill his sister and everyone else. But what they don't expect to find (D'oh!) is Michael Myers himself. On film, it's a piece of shit. It's vomit. Actually, it's shit stuffed up the bunghole, then vomited up and out.

I say this because Halloween: Resurrection is a badly written, badly directed, and badly acted movie. Worse yet, it's the most Sell-Out movie I have ever seen in a horror series (from the 80's, that is...I'm not counting the lame glam-horror of the 90's). It actually makes Halloween: H20 look like a genuine Halloween sequel, which is just downright scary.

I went in with low expectations. I ended up (literally) bursting out laughing to myself when I saw Busta Rhymes as the leading star. How they can go from leading stars like Donald Pleasance, Jamie Lee Curtis, Ellie Cornell, Danielle Harris, and Paul Rudd to the likes of Busta is just sooo beyond me. Halloween used to be the ONLY GODDAMNED horror series EVER than never resorted to camp...untill now. That is just sad.

This movie has (literally) one plot: The teens are venturing around the Myers house hooked up to webcams, and one person, at a party, knows that Michael is really there. There are literally no sub-plots, no characterization "filler" moments, and absolutely no character development scenes for Michael. He just kills and tilts his head. Like a Jack O'Lantern, this movie is hallow to the core. I never noticed how close the words hallow and shallow are, but I do now.

The teen characters are...to put it mildly...Halloween 5's teens on crack. It's like they threw all the different stereotypes out there into a hat, and the writer simply picked out six to use for his story. You have the worthless, Bubbly ditz (like Tina). You have the "pretty-faced, leather jacket-wearing, rebel type (like Mikey). You have the sophisticated-yet-slutty nymph (like Samantha). You have the cocky, horny lad (like Spitz). Also, you have the fucking annoying Chef-character Rudy, who's ENTIRE life revolved around lame cooking references and actions. I mean the guy (literally) viewed the world as his kitchen, he was that obsessed. He even threw spices into Michael's eyes as a defense. Oh, then finally you have the goody two-shoes survivor. It should be noted there are two more teenagers in the movie, and their stereotypes are so incredibly old...you may remember these kids from a certain Molly Ringwald movie...Sixteen Candles. Remember the lame, dorky freshmen who wanted to get into the senior's party and be "cool"? Well, they are back in modern fashion, only one has the added stereotype of being a complete computer freak. The actors do not attempt to make their characters break from these molds in the slightest. They also never generate the slightest bit of sympathy from the viewer, including the survivor.

The adult characters aren't much better. I'll discuss JLC later. You have a greedy entrepeneur, a dancing secretary (or assistant), a disgruntled camera man, and some bumbling security guards and nurses at the beginning. Again, none of them manage to rise above the script.

Technology. Yes folks, it's 2002 and every teenager in Haddonfield is addicted to some sort of modern technology. Webcams attached to the main kids. Internet romance. Communicating on a Palm Pilot. Kids leaving the debauchery of a halloween party to view an Internet Broadcast. And the "overly" elaborate video set-up in the Myers Garage (wtf?).

Every prediction I made about the movie came true....The only thing I predicted that didn't come true was sex in Judith's Room (although they got pretty damn close with the whole flashing thing), but there was sex (or close encounters of sex) in the Myers' Underground Labyrinthe (dun Dun DUUUUUUNNNNNN) which, dontchaknow, seems to spread out across Haddonfield. Uh huh. *rolls eyes* We also got Tina 2 and Rudy (ironically the 2 most annoying characters) smoking from a Bong in one of the bedrooms, which I'm sure was added in during the reshoots. Incidently, Halloween 1 and 2 were the only other sequels to showcase pot smoking...

One thing I wasn't expecting AT ALL was the reincarnation of Tina Fucking Williams...this time with blonde hair. Why in the name of God would they intentionally create a character that is a clone of one of THE most hated Characters in Halloween lore? I mean, COME ON! As soon as I saw her, I whispered to my good friend Jason Pintar (who was sitting next to me) "Oh my god, It's Tina 2!" She was irritating to the core, grinding her lines into my head with those psychotic looking eyes and smile of hers. Easily the worst character since Tina, and I can only pray they never go down this road again.

Rick Rosenthal. The man was thrown off Halloween 2, and hid his name on Birds 2. Since then, he has been lost in television obscurity. I can see why. Yes, the movie has *some* chilly moments, and I did find myself jumping a few times (mostly from the loud booming music scares....but that mirror scene was a technically well-crafted scene). He doesn't know how to set a scene at all. Instead of making the Myers House a presence in and of itself, he simply uses it as a spooky backdrop. I noticed the first time we see the house, R&B pop music is playing loudly, instead of an eerie music set. When the characters are walking around the house, he doesn't establish the rooms they are in at all. I was constantly confused trying to remember where the characters were (which I didn't expect, seeing as how many times I've watched Halloweens 1 and 6.) Another reason he didn't establish scenes well was due to the constant irritating flash cuts to Webcam viewpoints. Was Joe Chappelle directing this? Or the man who did frightening long establishing shots of Haddonfield Memorial Hospital's dark and sinister hallways. You tell me, because I'm certainly not sure.

Another thing Rosenthal did quite well in Halloween II was expanding on the town of Haddonfield itself, and the sense of evil that was lurking around it's quiet setting. Actually, every sequel (with exception to H20) has done a great job of making Haddonfield a "character" in and of itself, both through buildings and neighborhoods, as well as through town residents themselves. Bringing back old residents always helped in spades (Brackett, Meeker, Tommy Doyle for example), and bringing up old characters or plots in conversation helped as well. The fact that we see Haddonfield in such distinct time periods as the seventies, the eighties, and finally the nineties was an unplanned bonus, because it integrates the town in our minds, similar to our own hometowns. Back to Halloween 2 briefly, Rosenthal really got into the town of Haddonfield itself, taking us through the dark back alleys, through the quiet neighborhoods (even peeping into the windows to observe the residents). Late night trick or treaters and partying teens roamed the streets. The Haddonfield police were combing the entire town. Characters made constant references to the different locals and fellow-residents, as people who actually live in the town tend to do. Not to mention that aside from that, we got to know the hospital very well.

In this movie, Haddonfield is nowhere to be seen. We know they are in Haddonfield because of the preposterous Haddonfield University, a huge-ass rambling affair. So this "quaint" small town is actually a campus town? Since WHEN? I accepted the Haddonfield Community College shown to us in H6, because it was actually a small school for local kids. But this? I don't think so. We see THREE "scenes" of Haddonfield, and they all last under five seconds. The first is a quick shot of a random business street, where the characters are at a clothing store. The second is a quick sweep shot of the Neighborhood on Lampkin Lane. Odd how the houses are absolutely NOTHING like the Myers house in terms of design and time-frame style. It's as if the entire neighborhood was paved over (except the dilapidated house, of course) and rebuilt to modern Canadian standards (with odd, un-Illinois vines growing all over the houses, no less). The third was a quick shot of three trick-or-treaters skipping up to the Myers house and placing a Jack O'Lantern on the porch, giggling about the Boogyman. We never go outside after that. NONE of the characters seem to have ANY connection to Haddonfield, aside from being affiliated with the Haddonfield University.

On a more personal note, the man couldn't even include his own wife's late, great character Marion Chambers in the "death count" at the beginning? I was actually quite surprised...that was continuity he SHOULD have known...I hope Nancy Stephens made it a point to mention that to him upon viewing. Of course, that "death count" was pretty shoddily-written as it was (luckily they had a mental patient spouting it off so they can simply use him as a scapegoat, similar to what Michael did). He actually seperates Halloween and Halloween II's murders (getting II's murders wrong at that), and completely skips over part 4's murders, part 5's murders, part 6's murders, and gets H20's murders all wrong. 4 teenagers were killed at Hillcrest Academy? John and Molly are dead, then? Please. They will probably use that as a ploy "John and Molly FAKED their deaths (in a car accident, no less...the most-used means of off-screen death in Halloween history. The Myers died in a car accident. Laurie "died" in a car accident. Jimmy Lloyd and his wife died in a car accident. Dr. Loomis will probably be revealed to have died in a car accident. I'm sure Tommy and Kara died in a car accident involving the red Jeep right after Halloween 6), bla bla bla."

The score was, for the most part, nothing to write home about. Danny Lux had a relatively strong momentum going in the opening credits, with a (admittedly) nice take on the Halloween theme (I will say it sounds ten times better than the flutes in H20 or the screaming guitars in 6). But after that, the music is pretty standard. I was expecting more of the classic Halloween tunes to pop up....like...say...LAURIE'S THEME. The music surrounding Laurie's death was campy. If they were going for the dramatic, they should have went all out with the orchestra...instead we get a wilty "t.v. mini-epic" number. The "scary" music in the Myers house was nill, and the quick "five-second pick-up"'s of the Halloween theme every once in a while was hardly what I was looking for. The musical stings were certainly there, ready to blair out at the 600 "fake scare" moments (I think this one has Urban Legend beat in this department). Overall I don't care to buy the soundtrack. I may, someday, download the actual Halloween theme from the movie, because it was the only decent score in the film (oddly enough, written by John Carpenter).

The actors. Some of them tried (to a degree, but they obviously knew they were making Halloween 8), most of them were just your typical bland actor. Like I said earler, I felt nothing for any of the characters, including the survivor Sara Moyer. I honestly didn't feel any dread that Michael was in the house, because I seriously didn't care if any of them survived. It actually would have been refreshing HAD Michael killed them all. I was hoping that Rudy and Tina 2 were killed off early (much to my ultimate dismay), which is a sure sign that the movie is bad.

The ending was, to put it mildly, pathetic. Sara was aweful in the garage. The fact that she just hung around in the Myers Garage instead of getting the hell out of there was so contrived. Her *dull surprise* when the chainsaw stopped was simply lame. If a killer is after you, and your one chance for survival jams up, you don't act as if you broke a damn nail...you scramble desperately for another plan or at the least you display the pure dread of your problem. You don't just make a cute face of confusion and say "oh shit."

Casting Busta Rhymes was, without a doubt, the most ridiculous thing about Halloween 8. Where in the name of God did they think making him the main star would be a Good move for the series? The answer, sadly, comes from the monetary viewpoint. LL Cool J brought the African-American audience into the Halloween franchise for the first time. And Moustapha likes an added audience. It's all about the casting nowadays, and Busta was "perfect" for Dimension's needs.

Having Busta jump in to Save The Day [TM] was the most eye-rolling ploy I've seen since LL Cool J survived Halloween: H20 after being shot in the head and walking around talking on the phone literally hours later. Busta (aka Freddie Harris...but who really sees him as Freddie and not as Busta?) is stabbed repeatedly, and quite deeply as I recall...then he is literally thrown by Michael's cannonball arms into a wall, yet the man can still do Kung-Fu and make wise-cracks? It's almost as if the franchise is making a new cliche of "black characters (played by popular rappers) always get killed but come back to life".

The added-ending in the morgue was fair, at best. It was very un-Halloweenlike, however. Having a half-burned Michael suddenly open his eyes is more reminiscent of a Friday the 13th sequel.

I would also like to quickly point out that a character named Sarah was in H20. It is simply lame to give characters the same name in a series (Friday the 13th gave us Sandra, Sandra, and Casandra....Debbie, Deborah, and Deb.....Tina and Tina.....Lizabeth and Elizabeth.....Joey and Joey B......to name a few). If John Tate (probably played by JC Brandy, at the rate Dimension is going) returns, he may refer to Sarah's death, confusing the audience. Let's not forget that John Strode is Laurie's uncle, not her son...who may be referred to as John Strode in a future sequal. Confusing on paper? Oh yeah.

Once again, Dimension has stuck it's massive Tonya Harding Lead Pipe [TM] up the asses of Donald Pleasance, Danielle Harris, Ellie Cornell, and the fans of Halloweens 4, 5, and 6. They don't exactly go out of their way disexplaining them, they simply ignore them. They elude to the possibility that Michael has been living in the Myers' Massive Underground Labyrinth (dun Dun DUUUNNNN) eating rats for 20 years. You could argue that he has been living there since 6, if you cared to keep the timeline correct.

The Webcam approach. Like I said long ago, this is simply a late cash-in on The Blair Witch Project (let's not forget that it was supposed to come out in 2000 as Halloween: H2K. *rolls eyes again*) and MTV's "Fear"The whole messaging on the Palm Pilot was actually interesting. It almost harked back to Kara telling Beth he was right behind her on the phone. Unfortunately the movie went to fast for the palm pilot to be put to good effect.

Another thing, it *looks* like the Myers house on the outside, but it must be the Gothic Myers Mansion on the inside. That house is very small. I have seen it in real life. It is also (in this movie) incredibly dilapidated. I find it odd how those kids could seriously run around that house losing each other and not hearing each other's death's is ridiculous. While they did, for the most part, stay in tune with the real Myers house, it just didn't seem like a real house. True Halloween fans should have been able to spot the whole set-up fraud of Busta's very early on, because the Myers house was VERY EMPTY in Halloween! It would have made more sense to say most of the furniture belonged to the Strodes (especially since the hideous decoration was identical to Halloween 6's. Debra Strode will go down as the worst domestic interior decorator ever). Another thing that surprised me....did you notice the massive forest behind the Myers House? What the hell was that? Say what you will about the Sequels and the never-ending morphing Myers house, but at least they remembered that it's dead center in Haddonfield. I doubt a forest can just miraculously grow in the middle of a neighborhood!

The kids at the party were entirely unbelievable. Here they all are watching these innocent people die horribly, and not one cries or throws up? They just stand there shouting at the screen, pretending they are all Jada Pinkett-Smith watching Stab....and cheer for Deckard at the end...despite seeing dead bodies on the screen.

I suppose your wondering about my views of the opening sequence? I have mixed emotions. They could have easily panned the whole Laurie storyline into the entire movie, and I would have easily enjoyed it more. That Grace Anderson Sanitarium was pretty damn creepy. And I must say I liked where they were going with Laurie's character. I like how Laurie has reached a stage in her life where she doesn't care if she lives or dies, because she's no longer afraid of Michael. However, even Jamie Lee couldn't save the sheer campiness of the entire ordeal. She is easily the best actress in this worthless piece of shit, and that really isn't saying a lot for her, since it didn't even seem like she was trying. I liked how she had her Raggedy Anne doll from part 1. I like how she had her hair grown out (I truly hated the "Jamie Lee Curtis look" in H20....it was so un-Laurie). I liked how she truly showed that Laurie is no longer sane. What I did not like, however, was how much ambiguity they left around Laurie herself. We only know the shell of everything. We gain absolutely NO insight into Laurie's actual mental state. All she does is talk about doors at the end of tunnels (when has Laurie ever directly spoken to the audience before?), and then we see her feigning catatonia knowing Michael is on the prowl. We then see her in a 1 minute scene with Michael, where she says some of the most inept dialog I have ever heard a character such as Laurie say. We learn absolutely NOTHING about her. John and Jamie are not worthy enough to be brought up (though we do see a wrinkled up mug shot of Josh Hartnett over Laurie's bed).

I did not like her trap. How she managed to rig a rope and hook to a garage door opener on the rooftop of a sanitarium is anyone's guess. And yeah, they had 3 days to kill her off, but come on! I can say a LOT of things about Laurie Strode, but I could never EVER say she was dim-witted. Did she honestly believe that the man who JUST tried to kill her wasn't Michael? That, in the seconds she was on the roof and he was not, he managed to switch bodies yet again? And the innocent man was walking after her with a knife? Please. And did she HONESTLY think that fall would really kill him, or just make him angrier?

And what was her famous last words? Well, since the long-going Halloween trend is to kill off a beloved survivor in the first 15 minutes, we have come to expect some famous "last words" to help their characterization come to a full close.

Rachel - I love you, Jamie. You be a good girl. Bye.

Jamie - You can't have the baby Michael....you can't have the baby.


Laurie - *kiss on lips* I'll see you in Hell! *fall*

WHAT? THAT was the best they could muster up? I have heard that line in so many goddamn movies it's not even funny...and some of them WERE from horror movies. I'm surprised Michael didn't reply "Tell 'em...Michael sent you! Hahahaha!" before letting her fall.

Now, to critique the characters as is:

Sara Moyer - I did not like Sara at all. She was oozing 'self-loving goody-goody', yet she seemed to have this odd fear of Michael Myers. Did they explain it? Hell no. Why the hell did she keep seeing Michael everywhere ala Keri Tate in H20? My friend Jason was positive they were going to reveal Sara to be yet another "long-lost relative" of Michael...which I *suppose* would have made sense seeing as how Sara saw Michael before knowing what he looked like. But they will probably leave that *revelation* for the sequel, ala Halloween II. Bianca Kajilich is NOT a good actress. She would have made an okay supporting cast member, but she is simply not likable. Try finding one person to honestly say they identified with Sara...you cannot!!!!! So sad to see the series go from having such beloved heroines as Laurie Strode, Rachel Corruthers, Jamie Lloyd, and Kara Strode to the likes of Sara.

Also, let's not forget Sara would have been worm-food had it not been for the handy-dandy webcams, internet broadcast, and computer nerd Myles who relayed her vital information easily. No other heroine needed such help to survive...why should Sara? Perhaps that is one of Rick Rosenthal's subtle messages about today's youth in reguards to technology. It makes us lazier. Sara was practically handed the escape route, and had the police called for her. No way she would have survived on her own. This is actually a VERY IMPORTANT thing to remember in the long run...Sara didn't truly save herself once in the movie.

Glad to see the Mental Shock of getting stabbed repeatedly, almost escaping death numerous times, being caught in a blistering fire, and barely escaping a fiery demise was diminished by the time the reporters came to interview her, so she could give her sweet, dewey-eyed thanks to Deckard, or whatever the hell his screen-name was. Final Grade: D+

Freddie Harris - ppphht. In case you didn't realize....this was Busta's movie. Like H20 was Jamie Lee's....this was Busta's. You could have replaced Michael with literally ANY serial killer and it would have been exactly the same movie. The Halloween saga was second fiddle to Busta. Hell, even MICHAEL was second-fiddle to Busta! He spewed such worthless prattle from his lips as "Trick or treat......muthafucka!", "Happy fucking Halloween!", "I'm gonna fuckin' Kung-Fu yo ass!" I will say that...at very small times...he acted human, but even then he had the whole "It's all about the Benjamins" vibe that really irked me. Men powered by Greed should not survive a horror movie...they are the ones who make them. The series driving man was Dr. Loomis, and Tommy Doyle was passed the torch beautifully in part 6. Now we get Busta. The series went from having such strong dialogue from the leading man like "We are talking about Evil on two legs." "I prayed that he would burn in hell. But in my heart I knew that Hell would not have him." to the likes of "Michael Myers isn't just a sound byte. He's a killer in Baggy Overalls!" and "You're fried like chicken!" The Halloween movies also kept the word "Fuck" sparingly, until Busta Freddie rode into town. Final Grade: D.

Laurie Strode - Jamie Lee Curtis, despite claims, put mild effort into her potentially last outing as Laurie Strode...and quite frankly I'm so over Jamie Lee at this point, it doesn't really bother me that they killed her off. This woman WAS a major part of the series at one point, but then she decided to ditch the franchise in 1988...feeling she was "above" doing Halloween movies at that point in her career. Then when her career hits rock bottom (Virus), she arbitrarily decides to return to the franchise to replenish it. However, in this movie we learn what she REALLY feels about the franchise...allowing herself to die ONCE AGAIN. But her bow-out was so anti-climatic and uninspired...riddled with inane dialogue. She didn't seem to really get any closure, and most of all she seemed to hardly care about the whole ordeal. Final Grade: B- ...and that's just sad.

Rudy Grimes - What was so special about Sean Patrick Thomas' "Special Appearence"? He was incredibly lame, spouting off Chef-related prattle. He never really did anything that notable, except try to slow Michael down with kitchen spices. Final Grade: D

Jenna Danzig aka Tina 2 - *sigh* Katee Sackhoff was simply dreadful in this movie. I hated everything she did, said, and emoted. She did not act scared in the slightest when she should have. I was soooo happy when Michael beheaded her with a small knife. Final Grade: E

Nora Winston - Tyra Banks? What the fuck was her point in the movie? How the hell is she given second billing? I think she's in the movie a total of ten minutes.....tops. We mostly see her, as Nora, shaking her ass around making coffee (and a lot of shaking ass, too...for like three minutes), then she's in a few group scenes, one quick one with Busta, then she's literally gone until the very end when we see her body for about 1 second.

The sad thing is...I really liked Nora. She had spunk, wit, and looked like SHE could have pulled this movie along all by herself. She also seemed genuinely friendly. I would have preferred seeing Nora live, and Sara and Freddie both die. (They could have shown her witness Freddie's death, then begin playing Laurie's Theme as Nora walks around the house, preparing to enter and face off Michael to protect Sara, ala Laurie in part 1) But no, instead she is wasted. Final Grade: B+ (the highest grade in the movie...simply because Tyra made Nora a real character in the incredibly small amount of time she was given.)

Donna Chang - Daisy McCrackin managed to play the Sophisticated-yet-slutty College girl with an amazing by-the-numbers approach. Her character was somewhat condensending, since she appeared to be snooty. She does manage to generate *some* sympathy when she's being chased by Michael, but's it's a case of too little, too late. 90% of her dialog (which constituted to 2% of the overall script, mind you) was bitching to Jim. I do think the actress herself had some potential to craft a better character had the script been better written and actually gave her a character to feasibly work with. Final Grade: C-.

Jim - Luke Kirby...well...to be honest, he is the character I remember LEAST from the movie. Seriously. Like, I remember the Sanitarium's staff more than I remember him. Him and Donna MUST have originally had more scenes, because he (aside from group scenes at the beginning) is given about four or five scenes to work with...all of which (aside from his death) are with Donna. His character actually had some character "growth" as I recall. We initially think he's some sort of "freaky, rebel without a cause" type, bent on death and darkness. But we learn that it's all a charade...he's really just a horny guy who liked to woo and bang sappy college girls. I don't think the actor really had a chance to grow (in the slightest), so I'll be fair. D+

Myles Berman aka Deckard - Ryan Merriman, like the others, had a flimsy script to deal with. I will say that he is a decent actor, who will probably grow to be a good adult actor. He didn't really go any extra miles to make Myles anything special. C+

Bill - I actually know Thomas Ian Nicholas, and he is a sweet guy in real life. I remember him once talking briefly about doing "the new Halloween" as he put it. He said it was fun while he was there, and it was hopefully his "last hurrah" at doing teen movies. Well, this movie certainly was a sad last hurrah, in my opinion. He was probably the most cardboard character in the script. His soul purpose for being there was to oogle Tina 2. Thomas had absolutely nothing to work with. We learn NOTHING about Bill...I mean NOTHING. Thomas was obviously having fun on the set, and it definately showed on film. He was practically skipping around the house, acting like his usual goofy self. Basically, he walked through a shoddily written role. Final Grade: D-

Scott - Billy Kaye was pretty stiff. He was basically the "obnoxous freshman". He was mean to his friend (though, admittedly, not as mean as the Original Script showcased), and he would have been perfect fodder for Michael. His death would be welcomed in a sequal...even if it meant connecting any future Halloween installment with this lame movie. D-

Michael Myers - Hmmmm......this is a bit of a toss-up. I think his approach to Michael was better than Donald Shanks, A. Michael Lerner (the FAT, running Michael seen in all H6 reshoots...many fans think he is Wilbur), or Chris Durand....but definately inferior to Nick Castle, Dick Warlock, or George P. Wilbur. He obviously watched the movies, which is good. I saw subtle hints of the Michael from 4 and 5. He really didn't do THAT bad. I hated the scene where Busta (in a mask) mocks him to his face, and Michael acts SUBMISSIVE to him. That is a load of crap. So Tina Williams could have survived had she worn Spitz' Michael mask in part 5? Please. Final Grade: B

Harold - I will give Gus Lynch credit...for trying. He wasn't really given many lines or room to establish character, but he did it for what it's worth. I could see him in a spin-off movie where he is a killer. C

All in all, the movie fell flat, and I am heartly saddened. Growing up, I used to look to the Halloween movies for guidance. The saga of Michael vs. his Family....or Evil Vs. Good, was close to my heart. Laurie (long before H20 was imagined), Rachel, Jamie, Dr. Loomis, Kara....they were all incredibly dear to me. I so identified with Jamie Lloyd as a young girl, and strived to be like Rachel or Laurie when I was a teenager. Dr. Loomis was the long-going driving force, with his chess-game of wits with Michael over the years, that made me realize these two were practically living off of each-other, for better or worse, and became one of my favorite aspects. Then H20 came along and basically told me to fuck off, I'm no longer wanted as a fan. Resurrection scolded me for coming back.

With the makers now abandoning the Myers' Family Motive, Michael is now Jason Voorhees, aimlessly attacking those for mundane reasons. Maybe it worked back in Halloween, but that was in 1978 when the thought of a maniac aimlessly wandering around with a knife was scary. Perhaps the next one will have Michael hooking himself up to Virtual Reality and killing off random kids who are also attached? *sigh* Halloween: Matrix Wars? Or perhaps Halloween: Michael of the Rings? Don't get me wrong, I am still a die-hard Halloween fan......however I have a brain, and I can recognize a Halloween movie made for me, a fan...and one that is simply made for money. It is kinda sucky that part 6 has to be the last of *my* movies, because that one really is a fucking mess itself thanks to Joe Chappelle and Dimension films. H20 is tolerable, in that it truly does leave the doors open for tie-ins to the previous entries, and they do attempt to be rid of Michael forever and show some Laurie Strode growth (or lack thereof). But this new one? To quote Donald P. "It was rubbish"

And as for the massive reshoots? What's the point? If you take a piece of horse shit, tool around with it to make it look a little different, it is STILL going to be horse shit in the end.

The Halloween movies have abandoned me, and a large population of it's fanbase in favor of the general audience who loves rappers and models and frankly they can have it. Halloween: Resurrection did nothing but crucify the series even further. Final Grade: E